Do you want to be a millionaire?

Serious question – do you want to be a millionaire? If you said yes, there are many ways to do it. Since I have never started a successful business, I can at least tell you how to do it via investing.

If you start at the age of 25, put $5000 in a boring ass index stock every year, and do it for 30 years, you’ll have a million dollars. Give or take five years, depending on how lucky you are.

Simply buying and holding the DOW will make you plenty of money because the DOW is boringly consistent. Some folks prefer the S&P 500. I prefer the DOW. But let’s not argue like a bunch of Progressive Metal fans about semantics. Both work.

Now what you’ll also need to do is setup your stocks into a DRIP account, which stands for Dividend Reinvestment Plan. If you have no idea what I’m talking about, look it up, and just do it. Trust me on this one.

The DOW historically

The DOW historically goes up around 10% a year, including Dividends. Actually, it’s closer to 11% since 1932. And knock on wood, I don’t think we’ll have another 1929 in our lifetimes. Or at least, I sure hope not. If so, I hope your guns are reliable and you actually have enough ammunition as it will get ugly.

But assuming 1929 doesn’t happen again, you should get over 10%. So you’ll do a little bit better than this graph below.

Romantic Metal for those who want to be a millionaire

This is why you should invest in the DOW

Of course, I’ve done way better than that because I’ve had more to work with. I started with zero, flipped some properties on the side, and had some pretty good company stock.

Losers will say I got lucky with the company stock, but I’d throw in that we worked 70 hour weeks. Did those losers work 70 hour weeks? Exactly. So they can go fuck themselves.

But back to the point, not everybody wants to move every two or three years. And not everybody wants to work 70 hour weeks at a startup company that rewards their employees with stock options.

So if you don’t want to do all that work, I don’t blame you. You put your family first. That’s awesome! No, seriously, that’s awesome. There were years where I barely saw my son. There are trade offs, and you need to decide what is more important for you.

So, do you want to be a millionaire or not?

You don’t need to work 70 hour weeks or flip properties. Simply put at least $5000 in index stocks every year (preferably the DOW because people who prefer the S&P 500 are ugly and they stink). Enroll your index stocks in a DRIP. Repeat for 30 years. Then cash out your one million dollars.

Yes, the chart said 32 years. I said you should get more than 10% and if you can invest more than $5000, then do it. Believe me, when you hit that first $100,000, you’ll have such a rush that you can’t help yourself and you will find yourself putting in $10,000 a year instead of just $5000. Thus, 30 years is an easy target.

Follow this, and you’ll be a millionaire. But like I said, give or take five years unless you’re willing to put in more money. And do not get emotional. Don’t do something stupid like panic sell. I’ve seen people do that before and it rarely ends well. Take your emotions completely out of investing. Your emotions need to be in your sex life, not in your financial life.

And when you make your first million, do me a favor and buy our albums. I donate a lot to Veterans groups and land for wolves.


Roman is an artist, composer, writer, and travel junkie.

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